Ok so here is the dealy-o: I am having lots of confusing and conflicting thoughts right now all of them surrounding the up coming few weeks. I have now only eight days, count them 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, days left in Vienna, Austria!! Three months have come and gone and I seriously do not even know where they went. There is so much left that I would like to do! And yet, I have done SOOOO much here.
Part of me feels as though I have changed quite a bit and then another thinks that I have simply enhanced what was already there, or that I have just realized more about how I already was. More of a revelation ( ;] ) then anything else. Yet, I still do not understand why I feel the way that I feel. There is such a mixture of excitement, depression, apprehension, anxiety, happiness, fear, . . . I mean almost every emotion possible is playing around in there at once!! It is crazy! It reminds me of the line in Harry Potter when Ron says "one person couldn't feel all that. They'd explode" Well, I am now further proof that one can feel those many different things and continue to remain unexploded. . though that may only be for right now. Part of these issues, I feel anyway, has to do with the seminar that we had on Wednesday about the re-entry and reintegration period that we were going to face while going home.
Have you ever had a thought in you mind, one that you knew you had but did not really think about, and then one day someone makes you talk about it and it seems to never stop coming out? I think that this is what my brain is currently going through. Denial was working so well for me ad then I just had to have a discussion circle about it. [ But on a serious note, I am very thankful for the session. I know that it will help me when I get back to the states and I know that it is now helping me to cope with all of these emotions in a more gradual way then all at once on the airplane. ] My consciousness was blissfully unaware that the time was truly coming to an end though, thank you very much. ; )
But no I have had so many amazing experiences here and feel so blessed to have had them. Many people around the world are worried about simply surviving and I . .
Part of me feels as though I have changed quite a bit and then another thinks that I have simply enhanced what was already there, or that I have just realized more about how I already was. More of a revelation ( ;] ) then anything else. Yet, I still do not understand why I feel the way that I feel. There is such a mixture of excitement, depression, apprehension, anxiety, happiness, fear, . . . I mean almost every emotion possible is playing around in there at once!! It is crazy! It reminds me of the line in Harry Potter when Ron says "one person couldn't feel all that. They'd explode" Well, I am now further proof that one can feel those many different things and continue to remain unexploded. . though that may only be for right now. Part of these issues, I feel anyway, has to do with the seminar that we had on Wednesday about the re-entry and reintegration period that we were going to face while going home.
Have you ever had a thought in you mind, one that you knew you had but did not really think about, and then one day someone makes you talk about it and it seems to never stop coming out? I think that this is what my brain is currently going through. Denial was working so well for me ad then I just had to have a discussion circle about it. [ But on a serious note, I am very thankful for the session. I know that it will help me when I get back to the states and I know that it is now helping me to cope with all of these emotions in a more gradual way then all at once on the airplane. ] My consciousness was blissfully unaware that the time was truly coming to an end though, thank you very much. ; )
But no I have had so many amazing experiences here and feel so blessed to have had them. Many people around the world are worried about simply surviving and I . .
Have: A Higher Ability in German Learned More About Myself Learned More About Austria Felt as Though I was Austrian (a little) Visited 8 Different Countries Visited Adam Had Traditional Viennese Food Made Life Long Friends Passed My Classes Climbed Stephansdom Have a Gift for Everyone Visited Every District Kept Up on the Blog Pretty Well Done all of My Homework Met People From Many Different Walks of Life Tried Things out of My Comfort Zone Got Lost in the Back Streets of Venice Seen the Lipizzaner Horses Ridden in a Gondola Seen Mauthusen and Hartheim Visited the Museum of the Lost Race Visited the Capital City of 6 Countries Traveled by Train in a Compartment (MEGA BED!!!!) And Been Truly Blessed. . . | Want to: Go to Norway Go to Ireland Go to Greece Go to Rome Go to Berlin Go to Washington D.C. Visit More of My Own Country And most importantly: Never Forget This Trip |
I guess in the end you go back to the beginning and that is weird for me. One reason might be because I know how much I tend to run from change. Another reason might be the sheer fact that I did not know that I was going to be able to afford to come until very late. Either way, I thank God for the experiences and life that I have had because I never would have made it here without Him.